I Miss The Lips That Made Me Fly
by heycasbutt
Summary: Sequel to Three Cheers For Five Years. Ashlynn and Oli are perfectly content in their marriage, but not all of her sisters are living the dream. Will Amarie come in and shake things up? What about Jack? Has h found someone to replace Ashlynn? We'll see
1. Chapter 1

***Five years later***

"Aiden? Where is that silly little boy?" I called, playing along with the giggling little boy under the table. "I think I hear giggling! Is that my little boy?" I stooped down and grinned. "Aha! I see you Aiden!" I grabbed him and pulled him out, lifting him onto my hip, tickling him. He let out a squeal of giggles and moved in my arms, begging to be let down. "Who's little man are you?"

"Daddy's!" He squealed. I let out a mock gasp and tickled him more. "I lied! I lied! Mommy's! I'm mommy's!"

"I thought so!" I yelled, letting him down. He shot off running towards the now opening door. I grinned when I saw my husband, Oliver Sykes, step through with his duffel bag. "Oli!" I waddled over to my husband that has been on tour for three months.

"'Ello love." He smiled, leaning down to pick up Aiden. ""Ow's my boy?"

I smiled and watched Oli and Aiden interacting. Aiden was definitely a miracle baby. I had found out I was pregnant with him three months before I had gotten married to Oli. The doctors told me that, due to my problem with Anorexia Nervosa, Aiden might come out with a few complications and possibly a mental disorder. Well, my baby was a perfectly healthy boy with his father's eyes and features. He was a miniature Oliver Scott Sykes. I cried when I found out that I was pregnant for the second time. Oli was over-joyed when he heard, sadly over the phone, that he was getting a daughter. I was sure that he was going to spoil her to death and scare off all potential boyfriends when she was older.

"`Ow are my girls?" He asked, a mischievous grin on his face. I smirked and stepped closer to him, Aiden smack dab in the middle of us. He pressed a kiss to my lips, softly, and I let myself fall into it, before he pulled away to the sound of Aiden's gag. "Sorry, little man. I'll let you go."

* * *

"Aiden's asleep." I told Oli, crawling into bed next to him. He smiled and opened his tattooed arms for me, letting me settle myself into them. "I've missed you."

"I've missed yeh too, Ashlynn." He whispered, pressing a kiss to my head. I moved onto my knees and pressed a kiss to his lips. His hands moved to cradle my face as the kiss deepened. I moaned, allowing his tongue to slip into my mouth. I was laid onto my back as he pressed kisses down my jawline to my cleavage line. "Yer so beautiful." I gasped when he took my breast in his mouth through the fabric, suckling gently. I arched into him and his mouth continued to travel, pressing open mouth kisses to my pregnant belly.

"Ah, Oli." I moaned as he slipped my pants off my legs, along with my underwear. A phone ringing stopped us both and I immediately grabbed it, before it woke up Aiden. "Hello?"

_"Ashlynn? It's Amarie." _A timid voice replied. I hadn't heard my sister's voice since my wedding when I completely disowned her. _"Ashlynn, it's Papa."_

"What? What's wrong? Where is he? Is he okay?" I sat up straight and threw out questions like crazy. "Where's Bekah? Alysen?"

Oli pulled me closer and I was glad that I had a long t-shirt on, covering me. Amarie filled me in on the happenings with Papa and I began crying. Oliver pulled the phone out of my grip and told Amarie we would talk to her later. He pulled me into his chest, where I let my tears flow. He whispered soft words in my ear and I felt the bed dip a small bit.

"Mama?" Aiden's small voice filled my ears. I turned and smiled at the little boy, gesturing him to come to me. He crawled into my arms as well as he could fit with the baby bump in the way. "Why you crying?"

"Mommy just heard some bad news, dear. It'll be fine." I smiled, pressing a kiss to his head. "Now, why are you out of bed, mister?"

"I couldn't sleep. Bad dream, mommy." He said, his tiny voice breaking my heart. He looked up at me with those big brown eyes and I couldn't help myself.

"Oh, baby! Come here, sweetie. Tell momma what it was about, okay?" I cried, pulling him against me. I heard Oli groan, inaudibly. I smacked him, discreetly, and glared at him over Aiden's head. "Momma will make everything all better, okay, doll? Just let her get something done first. Here, go to daddy really quick."

~Oli~

She handed Aiden to me and he immediately clung to me. I smiled and watched her slip out of bed and quickly slip on some under wear and sweats, probably mine, and slide back in bed. She pulled Aiden back into her arms and cooed to him, quietly. She was an incredible wife and mother. She was there for most of the shows that the guys and I put on and was cheering us on from the sidelines. She never missed anything that Aiden had going on and was there for his scraped knees and play times. She was incredible and I was proud to be married to her.

"I love you." I whispered in her ear as she laid down with Aiden. She smiled up at me, her hazel eyes sparkling. "When he falls asleep, you wanna see if `e'll go back teh bed?"

She nodded and ran her fingers through our little boys hair, humming a lullaby that she said was from her Irish descendance. She was also Italian, so that was a truly dangerous mixture when she was upset. But, she was also a perfect mixture of beauty and brains.

_She is mine.

* * *

_

~Amarie~

"Alex, this is so hard!" I wailed, burying my face into his chest. He pulled me into him and rubbed my back, soothingly, pressing kisses to my head. In the five years we had been married, we only grew closer. Unlike Ashlynn and Oliver, I'm sure. They surely couldn't have stayed together. "I have to call Amarie."

"Are you sure she'll want to talk to you? You haven't talked to her in five years. You both said some pretty awful things at her wedding." Alex pointed out. I sighed and buried my face in his chest, small choked sobs falling from my lips.

"I know. I'm an awful sister, but she needs to know though." I told him. He sighed and handed me the phone. I dialed and heard her on the other line.

_"Hello?"_


	2. Chapter 2

"He's back in bed...again. This time, he is _out_." I smiled, weakly. Oli held out his arms and I, immediately, crawled into the warm, comforting embrace of my husband. "Oh, Oli. I have to go to the states. Papa is in awful shape. His cancer is back. The doctor's say they can possibly get him back into remission, because the chemo is working a little, but, oh, Oli!" I wailed, silently. I buried my face into his chest, letting out silent tears. His hand rubbed soothing circles into my back.

"Ash, yer tense as anything! Tha' is not good fer teh babeh." Oli scolded, turning me in his arms so I was backwards against him. His fingers dug, gently, into my shoulders, massaging them. I moaned as his fingers worked magic to rid my shoulders of the stress and knots that had been forming there. They slipped lower, working into my back muscles and more moans fell from my throat. He leaned to brush his lips across my ear, whispering, "Yeh like tha'?" I nodded, moaning. His lips traveled from my ear to kiss down my neck.

"Oli, you're a tease." I groaned, turning to face him again. I grabbed his face and pressed a passionate kiss to his lips. I had been away from this for way too long. Four months of him touring, I nearly died. Phone sex just doesn't work the same way. "Make love to me, Oliver."

From there, the room was filled with silence. My clothes were slipped, carefully, off my body as I trailed my hands over his already bare chest. All I needed was to shed him of his boxers, which I gladly did. I gasped when he lay me down on the bed, tying my hands to the headboard with my silk robe's sash. His hands traveled my body, setting heat trails on every place he touched. I arched into his hot mouth, covering my breast. His hands touched me, softly, and I couldn't help but arch into him.

"Oli..." I whimpered, begging him with my body language.

He obeyed my silent demand and plunged into me. I gasped and lifted my hips to meet his. He gently cupped the side of my face and pressed his lips to mine in a passionate kiss as he establish a steady rhythm.

As we got caught up in the moment, Oli lifted my leg up to wrap around his waist, allowing him to go deeper and hit just the right spot. It became more and more difficult to control my volume as I felt myself beginning to tense up and I arched up into him. I went to call out his name as my orgasm finally hit, but he knew it was coming and captured my lips in his so that my screams of pleasure wouldn't wake our son. As I was just starting to come down, Oli finished as well and then untied my hands before collapsing next to me and pulling me so my head was resting on his chest.

"I love you, Ash," he sighed and kissed the top of my head, rubbing small circles on my back as I drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Two days, full of rapid packing and airport shenanigans, later I was anxiously sitting in the back of a cab as we headed to the hospital where my adopted father was being treated. When it finally pulled up out front, I let Oliver worry about paying the driver and grabbing our son as I all but dived out of the vehicle and rushed in as quickly as my large bump would allow. As soon as I signed in and got the visitor's wristband from the woman at the front desk, I headed straight up to my father's room.

"Papa," I whispered hoarsely, stopping dead in my tracks as I saw his deteriorated condition. There were more wires going to and from his body than I could bear to count and he looked almost emaciated. All his hair was gone and he looked more like a grandfather than my dad. As I tentatively made my way to his side, tears silently began to slip from my eyes and rolled down my cheeks.

"Ashlynn..." A small, female voice whispered from behind me. I turned to see Amarie in the doorway. Oli appeared behind her and she moved forward her hand covering her mouth. "Oh, Ashlynn..you look so beautiful." She cried, throwing herself at me, hugging me, tightly. All the words that I remembered said to me at my wedding went out the window as I hugged my twin back, crying into her shoulder. We were family and no matter what we do to each other or how much time we spent apart, we would always love each other.

"Oh, Amarie. I'm so sorry! I said so many awful things to you." I wailed, pulling out of the hug to look at her.

"It was my fault, really. I was so awful. I wanted you to marry Jack and I was so selfishly bent on seeing what _I _thought would be a happy ending for you. But, I didn't realize that you _weren't _happy." She replied, wiping her face with the palm of her hand.

"'ello, Amarie." Oli said, coming up behind me with Aiden. I opened my arms for the little boy, smiling as he, happily, came to me. "Be careful, Ashlynn. Remember wha' the doctor said." I rolled my eyes and held Aiden close to my chest, before walking over to Papa, who had woken during our exchanges.

"Hello, Papa." I greeted, smiling, sadly, at the man hooked up to so many machines. "Aiden, this is you grandfather, Papa O'Finnigan." I smiled as he bounced on my hip to be let down. I sat him on the bed, beside Papa, and watched as Aiden began speaking, animatedly, to him. Oli walked up beside me and wrapped an arm around me, letting me lean into his side. "Look at him, Oli. He looks so...worn. That's not my Papa. Not the one I remembered."

* * *

I settled in the hotel bed, pulling a book out to read while Oli gets ready. I smiled to myself as I became distracted with memories of summers with Oli and Tom. We were always so rambunctious and our parents never knew what to do with us, but Papa O'Finnigan did. He was always one to make sure we had something to do that kept us out of trouble and entertained to the point where we'd fall asleep. Which is what I was doing right now.

_*Dream*_

_"Oli! Oli, look!" A fourteen year old me shouted. It was my first game to cheer at and Oli, mister big bad junior, was already working through his colorful array of tattoos. I was slightly jealous of the gorgeous boy that I could now call my best friend. He had so many friends and was extremely talented. I'd known him my entire life, but he was just now getting to the point where he would talk to me without being hateful. But, now he was extremely protective. I was budding in so many feminine ways that all the boys would stare, so he became my unofficial guardian. _

_I was schooling in England, while Amarie schooled in the U.S.A. I had chosen to stay with Ian and Carol when they invited me to stay for the high school years, mainly because I was already friends with Tom. Oli grinned as I bounded up to him and Matt Nicholls. Matt eyed me, up and down, before planting a firm glare on his face._

_"You're not going out in public wearing that, are you?" Matt asked. I giggled and nodded. "Why?"_

_"I'm a cheerleader, Matty! It's my uniform." I squealed when he wrapped his huge jacket around me. "Stop it!" I laughed, shoving the jacket off. We walked into the gym and I made my way to the group of cheerleaders, who were all eyeballing Oliver and Matt. "Hi, girls!" _

_They looked at me in disdain and turned their nose up at me. Head cheerleader spoke first. "Look, we don' want yeh 'ere. We only put yeh on teh team 'cause yer friend wif Olleh. But yeh aven't even introduced 'im to us."_

_I stared at the girl's in shock, before it turned to anger. "You bitches were _using _me to get to Oli? You guys are such idiots! Like he would even touch you! You're despicable. and now, I'm going to go tell him all this horrible shit about you so he never even so much as _looks _at you."_

_I turned on my heels, but didn't get very far when my hair was pulled back. I yelped in surprise and turned to hit the girl in the face. She squealed and held her nose as blood gushed from it. I smirked and turned to walk away as she screamed obscenities at me._

_*End*_

My eyes snapped open the next morning and I looked around smiling. I remembered that day. Oli had gotten so mad at those girls that he spread the worst rumors at school about them all. I was made the innocent girl, while they were made to look like complete sluts. From that day, Oli was the most amazing person ever. He asked me out my sophomore year and when I turned eighteen, he had been going on tours already.

"Oli. Oli, wake up."

He looked up at me, sleepily, his hazel eyes confused.

"I love you."


	3. Chapter 3

We visited Papa every day. I hadn't seen any of All Time Low, besides Alex. I wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing, but I wasn't dwelling. I had very little time with Papa, Oli, and Aiden, so I took every chance to spend with all of them. It was definitely hard with me being six months pregnant by now and I was already having difficulty moving to and from places.

"Ashlynn, yeh realleh need tah rest." Oli told me, getting very frustrated with me. I was being stubborn and I didn't want to miss any moments with Papa. "Ashlynn, yeh heard the doctor's say tha' he was getting better. But, yeh also heard the doctors tell _yeh _tha' yeh needed rest."

"Oli, I know. I just have to spend as much as I can before we go back to Sheffield." I whined.

"Ashlynn, we can't risk yeh getting back on a plane while you're six months pregnant. And then, when yeh have the babeh, you won't be able teh put 'er on the plane." Oli reasoned. "We're gonna have teh get a place here for a while."

I sighed. I knew this was coming, I just didn't want to think about it. I didn't need any kind of stress and I was already busy with Papa. I nodded to him and smiled, weakly, not letting him into my head. I didn't even want to be inside my head. Right now, it was the scariest place a person could be in. I was terrified of letting up the mental dam I had put up, because it would be a flood of crazy person.

Every thought revolved around Papa and the baby inside me. I know Aiden was born beautifully and healthy, but what if my bad eating habits a few years ago, caught up to me? What if it caused this baby to be born with a defect? I'd love her all the same, but she would remind me every day about the mess I made of myself. I would feel so guilty and it would kill me. I never wanted to put that onto this little girl.

"Ashlynn?" Oli broke me out of my thoughts. "Love, why are yeh cryin'?"

I hadn't even realized that I had tears streaming down my cheeks. I let out a soft sob that I noticed I had been holding in. Oli pulled me close to him, stroking my hair, softly. He never pushed me as I let out all the fears I had been holding in.

But somehow that small show of affection made me cry even harder. My lungs were collapsing. I couldn't breath! I had to get away. I tried as hard as I could to get out of Oli's grip, but even simple movements seemed to take as much effort as it would if I were lifting a car.

"Ashlynn," Oli called to me, but it sounded like he was miles away. His face began spinning in front of me, before being swallowed by blackness.

* * *

*Oliver*

I made my way to the lobby of the hotel, screaming at the receptionist to call an ambulance. Ashlynn was lying limp in my arms and I was sure that this attack would do something to the baby. I was terrified for the two women that I was currently holding. My wife and my unborn daughter. God, I couldn't lose either of them. They were the most important people in my life, along with Aiden. It would be over for me if I lost any of them.

We made it to the hospital and by this time I had called Amarie and she was making her way up there. I watched as the doctor fiddled with wires and IV's, placing them in specific places and rushing her into a room.

"Oliver Scott Sykes!" Amarie screeched. I winced at the high pitched sound. "What on _earth _happened to my sister?"

"She got overwhelmed, Am'rie. Calm yehself." I spoke, trying to calm the fuming woman in front of me. That just made it worse. "Am'rie! She was overthinking. Yeh know how she gets."

She seemed to calm ever so slightly, but soon tears were falling. I sighed and walked closer to her, awkwardly patting her on the back. She never did like me, so I'm not sure how I was going to comfort her. I was always closer to Ashlynn, who had an easier time accepting my love of all things screaming, tattoos, and piercings. In fact, she was there when I got my first ever tattoo. Just like I was there when she got hers.

She seemed not to notice my attempt at comfort, but instead, wrapped her arms around my waist. She buried her face and cried, harder than before. She was shaking, visibly, and it made my form shake. I was impossibly glad to see Alex come into the hospital and spot us. Mouthing 'Help' I pointed down to the girl that was clinging to me. He nodded and pulled her away.

"Excuse me. Mister Sykes?" A doctor approached me. I turned and nodded, waiting patiently for him to tell me what was going on with Ashlynn. "My name is Doctor Hudgins. It's safe to say that your wife will be just fine. As for the baby? We stopped delivery and they will be just fine."

"Wai'. They?" My expression went straight to shocked.

"Yes sir. Apparently, one of the little ones hid behind her sister in your last ultrasound." He chuckled. "Happens all the time. It's nothing to worry about."

* * *

**Sorry it's short today. I really wanted it updated soon(:  
**


	4. Chapter 4

I woke up, blinded by bright white lights. I grimaced and turned my head, hoping to let the lights dim. I turned to see Oliver sleeping, in the most uncomfortable looking position, on a hospital chair. I smiled and tried making small noises to get him to wake up. He finally began to stir, his hazel eyes opening, slowly. I smiled, sleepily, at him and giggled when he leapt to his feet.

"G'mornin' Ashlynn. 'Ow're yeh feelin'?" He asked, sitting on the side of the bed.

"Tired. I just wanna sleep." I told him, truthfully. "What happened?"

"Yeh had an attack and passed out." He replied, looking at me, seriously. "I tol' yeh. Yeh need to rest more and stop stressing abou' stuff so much."

I let my eyes fall to my hands, which were twiddling in my lap. He lifted my eyes to meet his, portraying the love and worry he was feeling, before he pressed a kiss to my lips, softly. I responded, quickly, letting our lips mesh and move together, as if they were perfect fits. I moved my hands to rest on his shoulders, my fingers playing with the strands of his hair that fell there.

"I love yeh, Ashlynn. I just wan' yeh healfy." He whispered, leaning his forehead against mine. I nodded, tears collecting in my eyes, blurring my vision. "Don' cry."

"I'm sorry, Oli. I really am." I whimpered, letting a few tears fall down my cheeks. "I just worry so much about Papa and Amarie and Aiden. I don't really care to think about myself sometimes."

He sighed and pressed his lips to my forehead, comfortingly. I hiccupped and let a few more tears be shed, before wiping them away. His hazel eyes were dark with love and worry, but I could see a hint of happiness in the back burners of them. He smiled at me and kissed me once more. This time I could actually comprehend the cold metal against my lips. I gasped and pulled away, excitedly, pressing my fingers to his lip where his lip ring rested. I looked up and smiled, softly.

"You put it back in..." I whispered, smiling. He nodded and I all but tackled him to press a kiss to his lips, moaning at the sensation of his lip ring against my bare lips. "You're amazing." I mumbled, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He chuckled and pressed his lips to my forehead. "I know, love."

I rolled my eyes and smacked him, lightly, on the chest. "You're incorrigible." I laughed, curling back into his chest. He chuckled and pulled me close. "But, I guess I can forgive you."

He chuckled and pressed me close to him, his arms wrapping, delicately, around my large stomach. I sighed in content and let my eyes flutter close.

_"Ashlynn. It's so good to see yeh again." Carol smiled. Seventeen year old me grinned back, wrapping my arms around the older woman. "Oliver and Tom are in the living room, dearie."_

_I nodded in thanks and grabbed a cookie off the sheet, skipping into the living room. Smiling, I jumped on top of Oliver, who was laying in the floor. He shouted in surprise and flipped us over, where I was beneath him. I grinned up at him and struggled, my hands pinned above me._

_"Now, Ashy. Tha' wasn't nice." He whispered, his mouth close to my ear. I shivered and looked up at him. "Now, give me a kiss."_

_I grinned, and let my eyes close as his mouth lowered to meet mine. My earth shattered as his lips pressed against mine, so caring, so gentle. I felt him let my wrists go so his hands could cup my face. I wrapped my arms around his neck, squeaking when he pulled us up._

_"Oi! Ge' a room, yeh lovebirds." Matt's voice cut through our little world. I pulled away and grinned, sarcastically, at him, my middle finger lifted in the air. "Yeh silly bird, tha's wha' yeh have Oleh for!"_

"Ashlynn. Wake up, sweetie."


	5. Chapter 5

*Seven months pregnant*

"I'm a fucking whale." I whined, placing my hands on my stomach. Oli chuckled as he pulled me by my waist, to get me closer to him. I could feel his lips press against the top of my head as we walked through the mall together.

Half of the people that passed us, giving us disgusted looks, I knew. From High School and younger. I didn't always go to English schooling. My first year, eight grade, I was in American schooling, and constantly being visited by Oliver and the rest of his family. The people I schooled with in that time, hated me. They teased me and poked fun at me for being different and having different tastes.

"Ashlynn? Is that you?" A nasal voice from behind me called, making me shiver with distaste. I turned to see an ex friend of mine looking at Oliver and myself in disgust. "It is! And who is this?"

"This is my husband, Amy." I replied, keeping my voice calm.

"Oh, I always knew you had horrible taste in men." She sneered.

I saw red. "Excuse me? My husband is the greatest man and father I will ever know. Do not insult him, especially when he is standing right there with our son."

She looked taken aback, before a scowl was placed on her face. "Oh, really? I didn't think you could have children. Anorexia really messes you up."

"Well, as you can see, I have a beautiful son and am pregnant with a set of twins. And, yes, I know what Anorexia does. I can see, clearly, what it's done to you."

That was it, as I turned around and walked off, keeping my cool as Oliver placed a hand on the small of my back.

* * *

The rest of the day went fine. Oliver, Aiden, and myself had a grand time shopping and just spending the day as a family. I missed being like this. No worries with the three of us, just happy family bonding. It felt like a piece of me that had gone missing was replaced in my heart.

"Alright, baby boy. It's bedtime." I cooed, taking little Aiden's hand and leading him to the guest room that he was using at Alex and Amarie's place. He yawned and reached his hands up at Oliver instead.

"Up. Up." He whimpered, bouncing on his tiptoes. Oliver chuckled and lifted him off the ground, hugging him close. I smiled and shook my head at the two as they made their way to the bedroom. "Nigh' nigh' momma."

"Night, my little man." I whispered, pressing my lips to his forehead. "Momma loves you."

"Love you more." He replied, his eyes closing. "Daddy, nigh' nigh'."

Oliver leaned down and pulled the little boy close. I crossed my arms over my chest, one hand going to my lips. I felt the tears blur my vision as Oliver whispered to our son. A smile flittered across my face as Oliver stood back up and faced me. I waved, a tiny wave, and giggled when he pulled me into his arms and out of Aiden's bedroom.

"I love yeh, Ashlynn."

* * *

_I was scared. Where was everyone and where was I? It was so dark, I couldn't see the hand in front of my face. I was running and I could hear the crucnching of leaves and twigs beneath my feet. I was in a forest at night. _

_"Somebody!" I screamed as terror filled my lungs, making things hard to breathe. "Where am I?"_

_I lurched forward and toppled to the ground. My foot was caught by something and I was trapped. Tears were pouring down my face as I screamed for help. There was no one, though. I was alone. I sobbed, the tears like huge droplets of rain, filling the space around me, drowning me. Both of these my greatest fears. The water filled up around and I struggled to keep my head above the water, even as I was tied down. I screamed, one last time, before the water took me under._

"Ashlynn! Wake up!" Oliver called.

I shot up, beads of sweat covering my nearly bare body. I gasped in breaths, trying to calm my steady heartbeat. I looked around, Oliver's eyes meeting mine, worry shining in his.

"Oh, god! I thouht I was dying!"


	6. Chapter 6

*Oliver*

The next few days were hell. Ashlynn wouldn't speak to anyone, not even Aiden. It was unsettling to see her just sit there, staring into space. I had no idea what was going on in her head or what had her so scared, but I needed my Ashlynn back. _Aiden _needed his mother back. It wasn't fair to either of us, or herself, to be so closed off to people. She needed to open up to people, let us help.

"Is she still not talking?" Alex asked, stepping into the room with me. I shook my head. "You should probably get her to a doctor."

"I know. She's eatin', but tha's about it. She only gets up to go the loo." I replied, whispering. "She's scaring meh. I've nevah seen her this way befo'"

"Oliver." A female voice spoke. I recognized it as Ashlynn. "Oliver, please...no! You can't take him!"

She screamed, a heart wrenching scream. I hadn't even realized she'd fallen asleep again. I jumped into action and threw myself on the bed, pulling her into my arms. She thrashed about, fruitlessly, as I held her. She was crying now, still, barely, screaming.

"Oliver, don't leave me!" She screamed.

"Ashlynn! I'm righ' here! I'm not leavin' yeh." I cooed, trying to wake her up.

"Mommy?" Aiden called from the doorway, crying.

"Alex, ge' Aiden!" I called.

As Alex carried out a crying Aiden, I tried to console my screaming wife. I sighed in relief as her eyes snapped open, glassy from her crying. I pulled her into my chest as she sobbed, clutching my shirt, tightly, in her tiny hands. I curled my hand around the back of her head and held her close, like a child. She scooted closer, till she was sitting in my lap. I rocked her back and forth, trying to keep her calm.

"What was it? What's wrong?" I asked, desperately. "I jus' wan' yeh to be happeh."

"You can't ever leave me, Oliver. You can't." She whispered, repeating it over and over.

"I'm no'. I could nevah leave yeh. Yeh mean so much to meh." I replied, softly, kissing her head. I lifted her head up, so her hazel eyes met mine. "Listen to meh, Ashlynn. Yeh are my life. Yeh and Aiden. I will nevah leave yeh. I don't know wha' has crawled into yer head and planted that little idea, bu' it bettah get out. Yeh are my life, Ashlynn Holly Payge. And if yeh aren't in it, I'm not living."

She smiled, softly, her tears drying up on her face. I had never seen her more beautiful. She was the most beautiful woman in the world and if I ever lost her, I wouldn't know what to do. She means so much to me and my heart couldn't take her ever leaving me or dying. She's given me a beautiful son and she's giving me two little girls. I love her with all of my heart.

"Oliver..I-I'm so sorry."


	7. Chapter 7

As I waited inside my head, my worst fears coming to life behind my eyes, I had forgotten about my family. I forgot about my son and my husband, my sister and brother-in-law. I hadn't realized that, maybe, they wanted to help me. They wanted to make sure I was okay, right in the head, you could say. I just didn't know what I was. These dreams, seeing Oliver leaving me and taking Aiden, me losing my twins. And, the worst dream of all, drowning alone. I wasn't safe inside my head. I don't think anyone would be safe inside my head. It's terrifying, to myself.

"Ashlynn? Yeh need to eat." Oliver whispered, placing a plate in front of me. I looked up and smiled, nodding. "Tha's wha' I like teh see. My beautiful wife smilin'."

If anyone, Oliver has been the most supportive. He doesn't tiptoe around me like I'm a fragile piece of glass, just waiting to be broken. If I'm not eating, he gets in my face and makes me eat. He doesn't treat me like a mental patient, or a retard. He treats me like I'm his pregnant wife who needs somebody to take care of her since she won't do it for herself. He makes me get up and get outside or eat when needed. He's definitely the best husband I could ask for.

"Oliver, we have a doctor's appoinment." I whispered, tugging at the bottom of my shirt. "I need to get ready?"

He looked over at me and smiled. "Yeah, yeh do, love."

I returned his grin and pulled the shirt over my head, taking in my large stomach. Placing my hands on my stomach, I smiled and gasped. I was still not used to the felling of two pairs of feet kicking me in the abdomen. It was an odd, yet exhilirating, feeling. I waved Oliver over and placed his hands on my stomach. I smiled as he knelt down and placed his head to my belly.

"Hello, babies. It's yeh dad." He whispered. "I love yeh, so much, alreadeh. Yeh gonna be so spoiled rotten when you get here."

I laughed and shook my head, shivering when he pressed a kiss to my bare belly. "No, Oliver. We can't get distracted. Plus, no sex after five months, remember?"

He pouted and I laughed, walking out of the room so he could dress. I needed to eat before I left home. Oliver would force me to eat something if I didn't. I chuckled, grabbing an apple and taking a bite of it. He was so protective of me, even before this little 'incident' happened. He was just worried, thinking I would go back to my horrible eating habits. There was a time or two that I thought about it. I hated the feeling of having that extra weight on my body, but then, Oliver would worship my body and tell me how beautiful I was. All thoughts of never eating again flew out of my mind.

I was so lucky to have this amazing husband that takes care of me and spoils me, making me feel like I was the only woman. Which, I was. Not once in our marriage or relationship did he ever think about cheating on me, much less do it. I was so happy with him. _Still_ so happy with him. There was only one person that made me feel like Oliver does.

_Jack Barakat._ The one man that was so loving and caring of me, always treating me like I was it. The one in his head. When I realized I wasn't in love with him, I felt so bad. I never meant to hurt him or make him feel like he wasn't worth my loving. But, it was just always Oliver. But, he still held a special place in my heart.

"Alex!" Think of the Devil and he shall appear.


	8. Chapter 8

The past month and a half of being back in the states, I'd seen neither hide nor hair of Jack Bassam Barakat. He, honestly, had the worst sense of timing. I was not up to seeing him and having my heart hurt. As much as I'm in love with Oliver, I can't help but feel something to the black-haired, lanky guitarist. He was there at a time when Oliver wasn't. I couldn't help but feel that small pang in my heart when I heard his voice or saw him. I had been lucky up to this point where I had not seen him.

I moved into the opening of the foyer and smiled, shyly. Jack's look of surprise was, quickly, masked by a smile of his own. "Hello, Jack." I answered for his call of Alex. "How have you been?"

I hadn't noticed the blonde that was attaching herself to his arm like a leech, sending me a nasty grimace.

"I'm doing great, Ashlynn. I haven't seen you in, what, five years?" He asked, a bright smile still plastered upon his forever childish face. "Look at you! You're nice and round. I hear your pregnant the second time around, with twins!"

I chuckled, darkly*, and patted my stomach. "The rumours are true."

"Ashlynn?" Are yeh readeh to go?" Oliver called, tromping down the stairs, fixing his cardigan. "Oh, hello, Jack. Alex is upstairs wif Aiden."

"Thanks, man!" He smiled, before looking at me. "It was nice to see you again, Ashlynn. You look really good."

I smiled, hooking my arm through Oliver's and watching them march upstairs. My smile immediately faded as soon as they were out of sight. Oliver took notice and frowned, pulling me close. I wouldn't let the tears out. As much as I still, sort of, loved Jack, I was married and fully in love with Oliver. I was having his children and I wanted to grow old with him. I was always going to be _in love _with Oliver. He was always there. From high school up to here.

"I love yeh, Ashlynn." He whispered, pulling me outside.

* * *

"Oliver, I'm excited." I whispered, sitting on the examination waiting for our doctor to return. He chuckled and pulled me into him, with a kiss to the top of my head. "These pretty girls will be here in two months."

Yes, my twin little girls will be here soon. Oliver and I were over the moon in excitement and Aiden coudn't wait to be a big brother. It was so cute, since we got the new house and all, he's been helping set up the nursery. He was just too cute trying to set the stuffed animals in specific places that he thought appropriate. And all of All Time Low, especially Jack and Alex, were helping out as well. It was great to see all of my family, related and not, together. Even though being in the same room as Jack was awkward, Oliver was always there to settle the tension.

"Welcome back, you two!" Dr. Phernusses exclaimed, sending us both a bright smile. She was our doctor ever since we sent in our paperwork from Sheffield and we loved her. "How is everything coming along with the house hunt?"

"We actually alreadeh bought one, doc." Oliver replied, grinning. "Aiden 'as been setting up teh nursereh for the twins."

She laughed and ushered for me to lay down. "That's so cute. So, I guess he's all excited to be a big brother?"

Oliver and I nodded. I replied, "He's beside himself. He keeps telling all the bands that come visit us; 'I'm gonna be a brudder!'"

She laughed again, spreading the gel across my stomach. I shivered and winced as I felt a kick in my belly. "You alright?"

"Yeah, just overactive babi-ahh!" I screamed, doubling over in pain. "Oh, god." I weezed, feeling the wetness between my thighs. "Doc, my water just broke. Doc, stop it!"

Her eyes went round as she stuck her head out the door, calling for nurses. Coming back in the room, she placed her hands on my shoulders. "Just breathe, Ashlynn. You're only a couple weeks early. Things will be okay."

"No! They're not due till January! Not till January!" I wailed, clutching my large belly, as if trying to keep them inside. "Oliver!"

He was frozen in shock, up until I screamed his name. "It's alrigh' Ashlynn. The doctors will help yeh! I'm righ' here!"

"They're not ready! Oliver, they aren't ready!"

* * *

***Look up Charlieissocoollike reads Twilight. You'll get my refernce. I found it hilarious. **

**Thanks to everyone who comments. This one is almost over, guys. Sadface.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hey, you guys. This is just a little author's note before I get on with the story. I realize that the last chapter was, not only short, but at least two months late. I apologize, greatly, for the delays. I'm not going to make up excuses for why it was late. But, I will let you know, I am in my senior of high school now. Things are going to be crazy, so my stories _will _be up late. Go ahead and throw things. I feel like an awful writer for delaying these. **

**Thanks all for your reviews! Now, on with the story!**

* * *

All of my family filed into my hospital room, probably against the nurse's rules. We were passing my babies around like a brand new handbag. At the moment, Aiden was curled up in the bed next to me, and Harmony was in Bekah's arms, being cooed over. John was, hesitantly, holding Melody. I laughed, softly, at his face as she began wiggling in his grip. He looked up at me and I held out my arms, reaching for my baby.

"Give her here, John. She must be hungry or so." I told him, taking the beautiful girl into my arms. "Are you hungry, my beautiful baby girl?"

The little girl wiggled in my arms as I looked, pointedly, at Oliver. His eyes widened in realization as he grabbed Harmony from Bekah, who protested. He ushered Aiden over to John and her, sending them out of the room. I smiled, shifting my gown where Melody latched onto me, drinking, hungrily.

"Yeh are amazing." Oliver smiled, rocking Harmony, gently, back and forth. She was gripping his tank, tightly, in her fingers and her eyes were slipping closed. I smiled and looked down at Melody, who was slowing on her suckling, her eyes drooping. "Yeh really are, Ashlynn."

I pressed Melody closer to my chest, careful of her small body. It was so hard to believe that she was here now and she was mine. I felt Oliver's eyes on me, and a smile crept larger onto my face. I loved knowing he was still in love with me as much as I was still in love with him. His hazel eyes still sent shivers down my spine as he grazed them over my body. Even though I was holding a baby, and he as well, and I still looked awful, he still managed to make me feel like the most beautiful woman on the planet.

"Oli..." I whispered, motioning to the sleeping babies we held. "They're beautiful."

He grinned, "We make pretteh babes."

I laughed, quietly, and nodded. "Yes, Oli. We make beautiful babies."

"How 'bout we make some more latah?" He winked, walking closer to me with Harmony. "Much latah, afteh these two are more grown."

I sighed in relief, shifting Melody in my arms. "You scared me there, Oliver Scott Sykes." He grinned and winked, sending me into a fit of silent laughter. "You're so silly. But, I don't want anymore kids just now."

* * *

A week later we were able to take our little ones home. Oliver was tripping over himself in happiness as we carried them out to our car and buckled them in. I giggled as I settled Harmony's seat behind the driver's chair, buckling her, tightly. I smiled at her sleeping face, ready to see her sleeping in her bassinet at home. I looked over, where Oliver was buckling Melody in behind the passenger seat. He looked up and met my eyes, smiling wide as I looked at him with his daughter.

"We did good, Oli." I grinned, motioning to the two little ones we created. "We did very good."

He grinned, "Yeh damn right we did good."


	10. Chapter 10

Things were hectic at our house. The babies were up at different hours of the night and Oliver was prepping to go into the studio soon. In London. I was being selfish, but he's my husband and I have newborn twins. How am I supposed to do this without my husband? I needed him to be here. Not in England, recording. I mean, I'm not untrusting of my husband, at all. I know he'd never cheat on me, in a million years. But, Jack, Alex, and Amarie have been over a lot more. I can't deal with Jack, especially when I still harbored a small ounce of feeling for him. Not enough to make me cheat, but it was still there.

"Oliver..can't you come out here to a recording studio?" I asked, pulling Melody into my arms. She was fussing as Oliver held Harmony. "I'm sure they'd understand. I can't have the babies on a plane."

He sighed, rocking Harmony back and forth. "I can ask, Ashlynn. But, I'm no' promising anythin'."

"I know. I just want you to try. It's all I ask." I replied, smiling. I walked across the nursery to meet his lips. "I love you."

"I love yeh too, Ashlynn. It won't ever change."

* * *

I was waiting for Oliver to get off the phone with his record company. He was asking if the band could just fly out to a close recording studio, like the one All Time Low uses, and record there. By the way Oliver sounded, things weren't going so well. I frowned, taking Aiden into my arms. Oliver, finally, got off the phone and turned to me with a frown on his face.

"Daddeh leavin'?" Aiden asked, his small British accent showing up.

"Yeah, baby. Daddy has to go back to London for a little while. He's making another album." I explained, bouncing him on my hip. "He'll be back soon, won't you, Daddy?"

Oliver looked at me and smiled, "Maybe a month, tops. I promise."

"Okay daddeh!" Aiden grinned, holding his arms out for his father. He giggled when Oliver grabbed him and whirled him over his head.

"Careful!" I cried, smiling at the pair. They were completely the same. I was surprised Aiden didn't come out of my womb with tattoos and piercings. He was just like his father. Music was in his blood, as he was always grabbing Matt's guitar or trying to bang on the drums. "You goofy boys."

They grinned at me, simultaneously, before coming over to me and attacking me in kisses. I giggled, pressing my lips to Oli's, and walked off towards the nursery.

"Hello, my beautiful baby girls." I cooed, picking up a wailing Melody. She quieted, just slightly, as I bounced her in my arms. Soon, she was falling asleep, pressed against my shoulder. I smiled, turning my head to plant a soft kiss on her head. "Mommy loves you."

"Aiden is down, Ashlynn." Oli whispered, stepping into the nursery. He moved to grab a wiggling, whimpering Harmony. He cooed soothing words, before realizing her hungry whimper. I laid Melody down in her bassinet and went to grab Harmony, pulling down my shirt in the process. "Yeh know, I've never seen anything sexier than tha'."

I blushed and rolled my eyes, settling Harmony over my breast. "You are awful."

"Yeh love me."

My heart panged in guilt. I did love him, but I also felt something for the lanky member of All Time Low. I felt horrible for even thinking something like that while holding Oliver's daughter. Was I a horrible person? Did this make me a bad wife? A bad mother? What would anyone say if they heard my thoughts right now? I didn't even want to think about this anymore. I just smiled at my hazel eyed husband.

"I love you, very much Oliver."

* * *

"Mommeh, why yeh cryin'?" Aiden called, toddling into the bedroom that I was currently sitting in. "No sad. Daddeh be home soon."

I gave my son a watery smile, holding my arms out for the little boy. He grinned and made a run into my arms, hugging me, tightly. I smiled, pressing my face into my son's neck. He was a huge miracle. He was only five and he knew exactly what to say to put a huge smile on my face. Just like Oliver did.

"I know, baby. Mommy just misses your daddy very much." I told him, rubbing his back in comfort. "You're mommy's big strong boy, right?"

He nodded into my shoulder. "Yeh, mommeh. I'm a big brudder."

I laughed and pulled away, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "Yes, you are. And I'm very proud of you. You've been doing so great with your sisters."

Speaking of his sisters, they both started wailing, catching my attention. I stood, grabbing Aiden's hand as we made our way to the nursery. I smiled, grabbing Harmony out of her bassinet. Bekah, who was up here still visiting, grabbed Melody. I watched as she made small cooing noises, soothing my wild little baby in her arms.

"Do you want one?" I asked, bouncing Harmony. "With John."

She looked up from Melody, her eyes wide. "H-how did you know?"

I grinned, "I didn't. You just told me."

She scowled, "You tricked me."

"I did no such thing!" I gasped, jokingly. "You told me, willingly. I just pushed a little. So, you do?"

She bit her lip and looked back down at Melody, holding her close. "We've been married for three years and together for six. I just...I can't ask him to do that."

I rolled my eyes at her naievety. "Can't you see? When John is in here holding one of mine, his eyes light up and you can just tell. He'd make a great father, Beks. You just have to try."

She smiled. "That's good. Because, I'm already pregnant."


	11. Chapter 11

_"_Oliver!" I squealed, clutching the phone to my ear. It had been a month and a half since I'd seen my husband. "I miss you!"

He chuckled, _"I miss yeh too love."_

"When are you coming home?" I asked, switching my phone to headset, so I could slip my phone in my pocket. "We miss you, so much."

_"I'm actualleh coming home in about three days, love."_

I squealed, bouncing up and down, excitedly. "I'm so excited to see you!" I giggled, walking into the nursery where the girls were whimpering, softly. "Guess who's on the phone, babies."

_"Put them on!" _Oliver shouted. I could hear a smile on his face. _"I don't care that they can't talk."_

I laughed, putting my phone on speaker. "Talk to daddy, girls. Daddy says hello."

The twins made gurgling noises, happily taking my phone. I heard Oliver chuckle as they 'communicated'. I watched as my daughters attempted to put the phone in their mouth, before stepping in.

"Sorry, Oliver. They tried chewing on mommy's phone." I giggled, grabbing Harmony in my arms. He chuckled and we kept on for a few minutes before he was called back to record some vocals. "Did you hear that, baby girls? Daddy's coming home soon. Are you excited to see daddy?"

They let out gurgles and squeals, making me laugh before I fed, changed and burped them. Grinning, I set them in their bassinets and grabbed the double stroller, buckling the two of them in. It was times like these, I was glad we didn't have outside stairs. And that this was a one story house.

"Going for a walk, Aiden. Wanna come?" I called, bundling the babies under blankets then bundling myself. I heard his footsteps as he came running down the hall, with his shoes and jacket already on. I laughed, "Looks like someone's prepared."

"Walk, momma, walk!"

I laughed, strolling the babies out the door, a very happy Aiden skipping ahead of me. I watched him, carefully, being careful that he didn't go off into the road. The weather outside was getting colder as we made our way into December. Christmas was upon us and this would be our first Christmas with the twins. I still needed to pick up Christmas presents for Aiden and my brood of people. I didn't even know what they want! I'm sure Aiden will be an easy one to shop for, plus the twins weren't old enough for anything but clothing. But, there's Oliver and Bekah, John and Alysen. All of my sisters and their husbands/boyfriends. I was going to have a hard time finding everything. As if I needed this.

* * *

The days went by, and soon we were picking Oliver up from the airport. He told me he had a surprise for Aiden and I, but wouldn't tell either of us what it was. Obviously, because it was a surprise. I strapped Aiden and the twins in, before settling myself into the driver's seat. I grinned as I started up the car, turning up The Maine's new album _Pioneer. _I got one of the first few copies they had. I hummed along as I played my favorite song on the entire record.

"I've been finking o' yeh." Aiden sang from the back seat, bobbing his head to the music. I giggled and looked into the rearview mirror, temporarily.

"You sound great, Aiden!" I praised, keeping my eyes on the road. I was very cautious when it came to driving, especially now that I had twins and a five year old in my care. "Just like your daddy."

He squealed in delight and soon we were pulling into the airport parking. "Daddy! Daddy!"

I laughed and went around to the trunk, grabbing the double stroller and expertly setting it up. "Yes, baby. We're getting daddy."

I set Melody in first, then went around to get Harmony. Aiden had already jumped out and was dancing in place, excited to see his father. I giggled at his enthusiasm and began walking beside him into the terminal. As soon as I heard Aiden squeal, loudly, I knew he had spotted Oliver. I grinned, wide, and made my way towards my husband.

I was enveloped, tightly, into his tattooed arms. I breathed in the familiar scent of my husband and took comfort in his embrace. I looked up and grinned, stepping onto my tiptoes to kiss him, lightly.

"So, what's our surprise?" I asked, keeping myself wrapped in his arms. I heard more men's voice, recognizing them, immediately. I peeked around Oli and the first person I saw was Jona, my little-okay, big-Australian. "Jona!"

"Oi! Oli, quit hoggin' yer cute bird!" Jona laughed, pulling me away from Oliver and into his hug. "I missed yeh, Ashlynn!"

"I missed you, too, Jona. Here, come meet your nieces, guys." I ushered them over to the double stroller, where all of them began cooing and asking who was who. I giggled, watching all the tough, tattooed men grow soft at the sight of the two babies. Oli, however, grabbed up Aiden and spun him around, making sure he got enough attention, too. I stood in the background, arms folded across my chest, and watched the scene.

"I see the marriage has lasted."


	12. Chapter 12

I turned to see the lady that was there, at the same airport, when Oliver and I first got married. I grinned and nodded, watching her reaction. She smiled, softly, like a grandmother would at her grandchild. She looked over at the men gathered around my three children, and laughed. I turned to see what she was laughing and there were the guys, dancing with Aiden and singing some silly song. Jona was holding Harmony in his arms, keeping her away from the chaos. Oliver was doing the same, bouncing Melody in his arms and smiling down at her.

I turned back to the older woman, only to see that she had disappeared. I frowned and looked around, but she was nowhere to be seen. I shrugged and wandered back to my husband and children, trying to hustle them out of the busy airport.

"Alright, how is everbody getting back to the house?" I asked, taking Harmony from Jona. "We don't have the room, with the kids and everything."

Jona laughed and waved me off, "We rented a van, don't worreh there, momma."

I smiled and set Harmony back into the stroller, where Melody was already fast asleep. "Alright, Oliver is coming with me. Aiden, you can see everyone when we get back to the house. You have to ride in your booster seat."

Aiden pouted, but grabbed my hand anyways. The guys and I talked as we made our way to the parking lot, where our rides were waiting. I smiled, watching Oliver put Melody in her carseat. You could tell he missed it, being around the kids. You would never have guessed he'd become this family man. But, I knew it. I knew he'd want to settle, eventually. I slid into the passenger seat, letting Oliver drive us home. I sighed, happily, leaning back and looking over at my husband.

"I missed yeh, Ash." He grinned, looking over at me. I smiled, looking over at my beautiful husband.

"I missed you, too, Oli. It felt weird sleeping in the huge bed by myself." I grinned, cheekily.

* * *

"Aiden, you need a bath!" I hollered, shoving my hand through my unruly, knotted hair. He was getting distracted by Jona, who was showing him how to play his little guitar, properly. "Jona, so help me god, let me give my child a bath..."

"Whoa, momma." He joked, scooping Aiden up. "Let meh give the little one a bath. Yeh need teh get some rest."

I huffed, plopping myself onto the couch, where the guys were taking up most of it. I rolled my eyes and got up, making my way to my room, where Oliver was hogging, saying I couldn't come in. I sighed in frustration, heading to the twins room, where they were sleeping in their cribs. Finally, I made my way to Aiden's room, where his bed was, neatly, made thanks to me. I breathed out, feeling tired and frustrated. I fell onto the bed, closing my eyes and falling straight to sleep.

_"Look, Olleh. She's sleepin' in her son's bed." _Nicholls voice whispered. I moaned and rolled over, promptly falling off the bed. "Oi! Momma, yeh okay?"

"Do I _look _okay?" I snapped, looking up at the men in my son's doorway. "I just fell out of my son's bed, because I can't find a single frigging place to lay down!"

I stood, flipping my hair out of my face, and stormed past my husband and his friends, leaving them behind, baffled. I grabbed a suitcase out of my closet, and packed a suitable amount of clothes. Since I couldn't sleep at my house, I was going to find somewhere I could. And I was going by _myself. _I was going to get away from this insanity and try and get a few nights of rest. I couldn't sit and do anything by myself while Oli was gone, and I couldn't while he was here either, apparently.

"Ashlynn, where yeh going, love?" Oli asked, placing his hands on my hips. I snapped them off, resuming my packing. "Love, look a' meh."

I spun to face him, a glare placed on my face. "_What _Oliver?"

He flinched and, for a moment, I felt bad. But, I was tired and irritable and just plain sick. I wanted a little bit of off time to myself, since Oliver gets to go traipsing across the countries and record and play for a billion slutty fans every night. I had three children, two newly born and one in a stage where he likes to pitch fits. I had to feed, clean, change, housekeep and all he had to do was make music. Of course, I wasn't going to ask him to stop doing what he loved, I knew what I signed up for. But, when he's off, can I get a little time to myself? Is that too much? Just a little off time to relax and regenerate my energy, so I can return to chasing after my five year old and keeping up with two month old babies?

"I'm sorry, Oli. I'm going away for a few days."

* * *

*Oliver*

As soon as Ashlynn left the house, all Hell broke loose. The twins started screaming and Aiden pitched a fit. The guys all stared at me, like I was going to do all of it.

"Jona, get Aiden. He likes yeh best." I ordered, watching Jona scoop up my son. "I'll grab one of the twins, but someone needs teh get the other one."

The guys were rushing everywhere. I grabbed Melody, rocking her, gently, to stop her crying. Taking her downstairs, I grabbed one of the heated bottles that Ashlynn left out for the twins. Thank god for small miracles. Luckily, Ashlynn wasn't so mean that she didn't leave us instructions. She just, kinda, teared up while she gave them. You could tell she didn't want to leave, but you could also see the stress in her face.

"Dear god. We're all screwed without her."


	13. Chapter 13

I laid my head against the steering wheel, trying to process what was going through my head. For some reason, I was sitting outside Jack Barakat's house, trying to get up courage to go inside and talk to him. I couldn't go back to my house and I tried getting a hold of Bekah, but all I got was voicemail. So, here I am, at my ex's house, still married and happy.

A knock on my window startled me from my thinking. I looked up, my head swimming as I looked into Jack's brown eyes. I stifled a giggle/sob at my luck. He smiled at me, but you could see the confusion in his face. You could see he didn't understand why I was here. I unbuckled myself and opened the door, watching him step back to let me out.

"Ashlynn..what are you doing here?" He asked, keeping the smile on his face. I let myself fall, the exhaustion catching up to my body. The world tumbled to black and I could hear a voice shouting, but I didn't care.

_I was finally getting sleep._

* * *

"Ashlynn, wake up. Come on."

My eyes fluttered open as I shook my head side to side on the pillow under my skull. I frowned, throwing an arm over my face. I moved it, glaring at the person waking me up. I yelped and scooted backwards as Jack's face came unusually close to mine. My eyes furrowed in confusion, trying to remember what had happened last night. I looked down, realizing I was still clothed.

"What happened?"

"You showed up at my house and passed out. Are you okay?" Jack asked, scooting back to give me some space. "You looked like you hadn't slept in weeks. You were out a whole day."

I sat up, eyes wide. "My babies! I left my babies home with five metal men!" I stood up, feeling dizziness wash over me. Jack stood, placing a steadying hand on my shoulder. "I have to get home."

"Hey, hey! Calm down, Ash. Oliver texted your phone. He said to get some rest and that the babies and Aiden were being good." He assured me, showing me the text.

_hello love. sorry you were so stressed. get plenty of sleep and we'll take care of the kids. Aiden has Jona wrapped 'round his little finger. come home when you need, love. xx_

I smiled, taking the phone from Jack's hands. I re-read the text, feeling my heart swell with happiness. My husband is the most perfect man in the world. He uprooted himself from Sheffield so I could spend time with my 'father'. He's given me three beautiful children, and an overall great life. I didn't deserve him.

_it's fine, Oliver. i'm with jack, but i'm about to go check in a hotel. jack helped me when i passed out in his front yard. i slept a whole day! how are my babies?_

"I'm going to go check into a hotel. You know, get pampered?" I told Jack, standing up and pushing away his efforts to help. "I've got it. I'm just going to go."

"Are you sure you're okay? I mean, you passed out on my front lawn." Jack asked, moving towards me. I backed away and nodded my head. "Ashlynn, why do you keep doing that?"

"Doing what?" Iasked, grabbing my TOMS. "I'm just trying to get my things together, Jack. I want to get relaxed so I can get back to my _husband._"

He sighed and sank down onto the couch. I felt a twinge of guilt in my heart, but I had to ignore it. I slipped on my shoes and got out of the house, quickly. I slid into my car and pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes. I needed to get away from everything before I go, absolutely, mental. I could already feel myself drifting into insanity. The stress was piling onto me and it didn't look like it was going to stop anytime soon. I, still, need to get Christmas presents for my family.

My phone buzzed, throwing out the sounds of Mayday Parade. I knew, for a fact, that it was Oliver calling me. I slid my headpiece in the slot and put the plugs in my ear, answering the phone.

"Hello?" I asked, biting my lip as I paid attention to the road.

_"Why were yeh at Jack's house?" _Oliver, automatically, asked. He didn't even bother telling me hello. _Could yeh not have gone teh Bekah? Or Amareh?"_

"I don't know, Oliver." I sighed, pulling onto the side of the road. "I just...ended up over there. I called Bekah, but she wasn't answering and I'm still a bit upset with my sister. I wasn't even there two seconds before I passed out in his front yard, anyways."

It was quiet for a few beats, I had almost thought he had hung up on me. But, he knows better. Finally, he mumbled an 'okay' and a small 'I love you.' before hanging up.

I sighed and turned off my phone, throwing into the back seat. This was mommy's weekend and no one else was going to ruin it for me. I wasn't telling anyone which hotel I was staying at, and I was perfectly fine with it. I was finally going to get some time to myself, without children screaming at me. I pulled back onto the highway and made my way to the nearest, nice hotel.

* * *

"Thank you. Here you are." I smiled, taking my bags fromthe bellhop and handing him a twenty. "Have a nice day." He grinned and left, leaving me to my thoughts. I looked around the room, smiling at the peace and tranquility it brought me.

I wandered further into the room, past the living area, to a door that lead to the bedroom. I grinned at the king sized bed in the middle of the floor. I dropped my things and bounced on the bed. Soon, I was falling back to sleep, curling into the comfort of the sheets.

I woke a few hours later, feeling refreshed and full of energy. That nap was the best thing to happen today. But, now I was going to pamper myself completely. I was going to give myself everything I deserved after being by myself as Oli went off and gallivanted with his band. Then? I'm going home to my babies.

I miss my babies.


	14. Chapter 14

I sighed as I checked out and grabbed my luggage, walking out of the lobby and into the cold, winter air. I shivered and made my way to my car, stuffing my bags into the backseat and grabbing my phone. Turning it on, I waited impatiently for all my messages to pop up. My phone vibrated off the handle and I waited for it to stop before I checked everything. My eyes widened as I saw the amount of calls and texts I got from Oliver. My heart went into overdrive and I thought of all the possibilities of something that has happened to the kids.

I dialed his phone and bit my nails nervously as I waited for him to pick up. Scenarios ran through my head, each one worse than the next. I nearly cried in relief when he finally picked up and I heard kids in the background. I let out a sharp breath and laughed.

_"Hello?" _He asked, knocking me out. His voice still managed to give me shivers.

"Oliver, I'm coming home today baby." I said breathlessly. "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I left, but I'm coming home, sweetie."

* * *

I made it to the house and was immediately pulled off my feet by my husband, looking haggard, even after only one day of dealing with the three of them. I laughed as he spun me around and placed kisses on my face. He soon let me down and I had a young boy attached to my legs.

"Hello sweetie!" I said in the accent I had picked up from being in Britain. "Mommy missed you so much. How did my big boy do?"

"He was perfect, momma." Jona laughed, coming to hug me. "But you have a new visitor."

I groaned. Just great, another person to take over. But my attitude changed when Lights and Beau stepped out of the house. I squealed and launched myself at the tiny girl before me. She laughed, hugging me back just as tightly.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked, hugging Beau. "I mean, I'm so excited to see you, but are you on tour or something?"

"No, we're off for a few months. Tracking and recording and junk." Beau replied as I pulled away from them both.

"So, I'm sending the guys to our hotel and have them take Aiden. We will take care of the girls." Lights grinned, grabbing my hand and pulling me into the house. "Come on. I've already seen those pretty little girls. Let's go fix something to eat."

I smiled, following the hyperactive, tiny girl in front of me. She babbled on about how excited she was to be off touring and just planning the wedding with Beau. Since they're tours never coincided, it was difficult for them to sit still and plan things. She was definitely excited to be at home with him. I watched her as she flitted around my kitchen, preparing some kind of dish for us. I jumped when hands slid around my waist and I looked up to see Oliver smiling down at me.

"Hi, babe." I grinned up at him. "Let's go talk."

* * *

"Look, I'm sorry about running off like that." I started, pacing in our bedroom as Oli sat quietly on our bed. "I've just been really stressed and completely frazzled here by myself and then you bring all the guys home and it's put me a little out." I turned and looked at him, placing a hand on my temple. "I know you wanted it to be a surprise, but _I _would have liked to be in the know and let it be a surprise for Aiden. Because that would have given me time to get the rooms straightened and everything."

"I'm sorry I didn't give you fair warning about the guys. I should have realized what kind of stress it would put on you." He replied, standing to pull me into a hug. "Next time I think of something like this, I'll talk to you about it first, okay?"

I nodded, pressing my face into his chest. I mean, we've had our fair share of problems, but we always talked them out and made sure both parties knew what the other was feeling. Not even my past with Jack could break us apart, because Oliver knows, or _should_ know, that I'm never leaving him. I love him way too much to let a past fling get in our way. I know Jack and I had been engaged, but we hadn't been together as long as Oliver and I had. Oliver and I have history and a future together. I couldn't see myself with anyone else but this lanky tattooed man holding me right now. He knows me way too well for that to happen.

"I love you so much, baby. I never want to let you go." Oliver whispered, pressing me closer to him.

"Well, you have to. She's mine now."

* * *

Lights grinned at me as soon as the van the guys rented was down the street out of view. I could tell she wanted to tell me something, so I waited patiently while hers quickly ran out.

''I'm getting married!"


	15. Chapter 15

I chuckled at the small, overexcited girl beside me and nodded. "Yes, sweetie. We've established this. Are you excited?"

She nodded furiously a large grin pasted on her face. She was so pleased with herself and just amazingly excited to be getting married. And it was about damn time, too. Those two were perfect for one another, and god knows they're going to make some beautiful babies. I just couldn't wait to see this tiny little girl beside me in a beautiful white dress.

"Come on. Let's go eat." I laughed, grabbing her arm and pulling her towards the house. "I need to keep an eye on the little ones anyways." I walked inside, listening to see if the twins had woken from their naps. "They're still asleep. But, let's get something to eat."

She grinned as we placed an order for pizza then made our way into the living room to curl up on the couch. I turned on _Iron Man_ and grinned at the girl beside me.

"Nothing like watching a gorgeous man marathon." I teased, plopping on the couch and folding my legs underneath me. "I just love this movie. I would _kill _to meet Robert Downey, Jr."

She laughed and nodded, "Definitely. Or maybe Chris Evans." She stuck her tongue between her teeth, scrunching her nose. "He's such a cutie."

I nodded. "God, that entire cast for _Avengers_ is going to be perfect."

We sat around and ate the pizza when it got here. But, soon, the girls began crying, waking from their nap. I flew out of my seat and made it to the girls' room, with Lights following behind.

"They're just fussy because _somebody _needs a diaper change and the _other _needs to be fed." I said, pointing at Harmony, whom Lights was currently holding. "I'll take Harmony, since she needs to be fed. You take Melody, okay?"

She nodded, as I set Melody onto the changing table. I grabbed Harmony from her and settled her on my breast. I was going to start weaning them both off and onto the bottle around five months, like I did with Aiden. I grinned down at the little girl in my arms, whose eyes were wide, taking in everything around her.

I couldn't wait for her to meet her godfather. Josh Ramsay was a wild child, but he was my best friend in the entire world and I wouldn't choose anyone else for her. So, that's my reason.

"That's a good girl, baby." I cooed, fixing my shirt and grabbing a burp rag. I patted her on the back until I got what I needed from her. She burped softly spitting up on the rag. "My baby."

She was already falling asleep again, so I set her in her crib, covering her with a light blanket. I smiled as Lights put Melody back in her crib. Their nursery was set up like a fairy tale, somewhat like the Marianas Trench new album, Ever After. Josh gave me the idea and I ran with it. It turned out perfectly.

* * *

"Hey, Josh!" I greeted as soon as my best friend picked up the phone. "You better be coming out to see me soon. You and the guys." I threatened, jokingly. Lights had already left with Beau and Oliver was in the nursery rocking Harmony. She was going to be such a daddy's girl.

_"I'll come see you soon. I promise."_ He replied, laughing at the guys in the background. _"She wants us to come out to see her soon."_

"Yeah I do!" I laughed, switching ears so I could try and wash the dishes. "You better mister! I want you to meet your goddaughter."

_"Woah, back the fucking truck up!" _Josh hollered, making me laugh. _"I'm a godfather?"_

__I laughed as I heard him and the guys yelling, excitedly. "Well, you sure as hell aren't the father. Unless, you know something I don't, Josh." I laughed at his stunned silence. "Josh, I'm kidding."

"We're coming out as soon as possible." 


	16. Chapter 16

"Joshua Keeler Ramsay." I scolded, a large grin on my face. "Why haven't you been out to see me before now?"

Josh grinned at me sheepishly and shrugged his shoulders. "Sorry Ash. We've hit it off so good in Canada, we've been touring." He grinned up at me as I held up Harmony, his goddaughter. Matt was Melody's godfather and I had already talked to Oliver about this. Jona was Aiden's godfather, also previously discussed. "Is that my goddaughter?"

I nodded, watching as he strode over and nervously took her from my arms. I grinned as the blue haired man stared down at my daughter, a giant grin on his face.

"This is my goddaughter." He whispered, grinning up at me. "She's so small and tiny." He watched her eyes open and he situated her to where he was only holding her with one strong arm, so he could let her play with his fingers. "She has such tiny fingers."

I giggled and waved at my daughter, her face lighting up. "Hey, baby. Hi, sweetie. It's mommy." I smiled as she grabbed my pointer finger in her small hand. "You're such a beautiful girl, Harmony. You and your sister both. I have such beautiful children."

"You're such a good mom, Ash." Josh grinned. "I never thought I would see you as a mom, but you're really fantastic." He grinned at me, before returning his attention to my daughter in his hands. "How does Oli do?"

"Oliver is the perfect father." I gushed, praising my husband. "He's so great with the children, spending as much time with them when he's home. But, he's great at making time to spend with me as well."

He nodded, still staring at my daughter. "He's doing really great, isn't he?"

I smiled, nodding as I took Harmony back when she got fussy. "Yeah. He's amazing."

"I'm really happy for you, Ashlynn. You definitely deserve happiness with all the shit you've been through."

I pressed a kiss to my daughter's forehead and smiled, again. I couldn't stop smiling lately. Everything was perfect with me. My sister and I were talking again, I had three perfect children, my husband and I were completely in love, and I had the best friends I could I ask for. Everything was going amazingly for me right now.

* * *

"Are you kidding me?!" I screamed, handing my child off to Josh. "You can't go on tour right now, Oliver! We have twin three month olds. They need you. _I _need you."

"I know. But, I really can't do anything about it, love." He placated, pulling me close. "But, I have some good news. The bus is equipped with a back bedroom and cribs have been screwed onto the floor. You could go with us."

I bit my lip, debating the thought. I would love to go back onto the road with him, but the drama that comes with it would be a bit too much. Especially because my children would be in the midst. And, I know the boys are loud partiers on tour. I wasn't going to take that away by having two babies on the bus. I looked up at my husband, shaking my head slowly. I took my child back and cuddled her close to my breasts.

"I can't, Oli. That's not stable enough for the girls." I replied. "It's always chaos on tour and they aren't old enough."

He frowned and walked towards me, pulling me into a side hug, being careful of our now sleeping daughter. I rested my head in his side, trying to think of ways to go about our situation.

"I'm going to put the children to bed. And then, I'm going to bed myself." I mumbled, pulling away from my husband. "Come to bed soon, love."

*Oliver*

I watched my wife as she made her way upstairs quietly, Harmony clutched to her chest. I worried about her reaction to my going on tour. She wasn't usually this upset about it. She's always been supportive of my band and my dreams. But, I should probably see it from her side. She now has twin newborns and a five year old. We aren't always the quietest band and with the babies on the road, we would have to be.

She was just trying to think of the guys and I, not wanting to ruin our fun. I was so stupid and selfish, not even considering how this would affect her and the kids. I frowned and slunk over to the couch, plopping down and burying my face in my hands.

"Dude, she's kind of right. Everyone gets wild on tour and then the babies wouldn't get any sleep." Josh reasoned. "That would just stress Ashlynn out more. She doesn't need that."

I nodded, running my hands through my hair. I'll let her cool off, knowing she's probably irritated right now. She was always quieter when she was irritated. I knew better than to mess with her until she's calmed down.

"I should have thought more about her when talking to the label about this tour. We just had the girls." I moaned, feeling like a total jackass. "I can't believe I didn't think this one through."

"You should have thought it through." Her voice floated down the stairs. I looked up to see her walking down the stairs. "But, it's also your job. I would definitely go with you, but you guys only have this so you can go wild. It's what you do. When you're at home, you have children. You have to behave accordingly, which means no wild parties, no drinking, none of that. But, on tour? You get to go as crazy as you want. Well, except you can't sleep around anymore. But, still crazy."

I nodded, watching her explain. This is why I married her. She was brilliant and levelheaded, beautiful and calm. She was my perfect match. Whenever I had thoughts to do something irresponsible, she was my little conscience, begging me to make the right decision.

_She was my anchor, in a restless sea._

* * *

**_Hey! I know it's been far too long since I last updated. I'm pretty upset with myself for not being able to update. I've been so busy, starting cosmetology school and everything. By the way, school is going great for me! I am so in love with my classes._**


	17. Author's Note

Hey guys. It's been quite a while since I've been on this account, three years to be exact. I've dealt with a lot these past few years, including the loss of a dear friend to suicide and the beginning of my journey through cosmetology school. It's been strenuous and quite stressful, but I'm peddling through. Sadly, I have lost my love for this story and can't honestly continue them without them being absolutely terrible. When I started it, I was genuinely proud of what it had become. I am upset to say that I have only finished one story on here, and it's not even that good. It is full of mistakes and it truly plagues me to know that it is still up.

I desperately want to finish some of these, but I just don't have the passion for them as I once did. If someone could help me figure out how to give the to someone who _wants _to finish them, please PM me and let me know. I would love to see them finished, if not by me, than by somebody else.

Thank you to those who have kept by me/these stories, even though they never made it to an end.

Heycasbutt. yours truly.


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